A Summer School Poem

It's come to my attention that I've recently been shamefully neglecting the poetry side of this blog. I shall rectify that immediately with a brand new poem which has the somewhat-less-than-snappy title

"On Being Joined In The Pub By Two Female Colleagues Whose Limited Range Of Conversational Gambits Had Previously Been Remarked Upon"

It is, of course a true story, and the title sums up what it's about. The only other thing I can say is, "you know who you are!"
Actually so does everyone else who taught at Harrow this summer.

I'd have really loved to talk
To someone about something,
And I thought, before they entered,
That I didn't much care what.
When they sat down and joined me
I found their conversation
Was on topics they thought jolly:
And topics I did not.
There was colonic irrigation,
Beauty treatments, oral sex
And what to do with boyfriends
Come to visit for the day.
One turned to me and murmured
"I forgot your not a girl, Bob!"
But it didn't stop her finding
Some more similar things to say.
So I finished up my beer;
Said, "I don't think that there is much
I can contribute to this, or
Any other conversation.
So, if it's all the same to you,
Though it's early, I'll be going."
There's a lot to say for silence
In that kind of situation.